In the Name of God

“What’s your religion?”

In Australia or other western countries like the United States, Canada or the United Kingdom, this question may be seen as an intrusion of one’s personal life. Westerners might ask this question after knowing someone for a number of months, or they just eventually find out. But where I’m from, this question is usually asked within the first hour of one’s conversation with someone they just met. When I first arrived in Perth this question was also almost asked every time I meet someone from Indonesia the first time.

For now, I think I believe in the existence of a higher power, whatever you may call it. I like to call it Mother Nature. I don’t know what she’s capable of and whether she’s good or evil, but I can appreciate her through nature though I don’t worship her. She is grand, but I know she doesn’t have power over my free will. My faith might have been a mixture of the principles found in Wicca, Buddhism and the Church of Satan. However, it is safe to say that I have no religion.

Despite my current belief, I was raised a Christian. I had learned the Bible, I was even an active youth member of my church when I was 14. When I was 16 I started questioning whether going to church was necessary. By then, I had noticed: in the beginning, there was no religion. Man communicated with God not by going to church. I stopped going to church.

By the time I was 18, other questions surfaced: did King David attack Jebusite and took over Jerusalem because God told him so, or did he do so just to expand his own kingdom and used God’s name to justify his actions, and if God loved men so much why would he favour one nation over the others? I put down the Bible once and for all and started drifting away from Christianity.

Since before Jesus was even born, God’s name has been used to justify human actions. David went to war with the Phillistines, Moab, Hadadezer and the Syrians and claimed his victory given by God. He even “took the shields of gold that were on the servants of Hadadezer, and brought them to Jerusalem” and “from Betah, and from Berothai, cities of Hadadezer, [he] took exceeding much brass” (2 Samuel 8:7-8). Let us recall the London Riot looters. Justify their actions with God’s name; we’ve got king David.

Claiming one’s faith rightful and other blasphemous is not new. The most common example the world has become familiar with is probably the Islamic Jihad. However, kings in the Bible can also be seen as mujahideen (people engaged in jihad). The highly respected Catholic Joan of Arc went to war in the name of God. Heterodox Christian Hong Xiuquan of Guangdong wanted to establish the Taiping Heavenly Kingdom. The church executed people believed to be witches to death in the Salem witch trials. India has seen religion based violent attacks between Christianity, Islam and Hinduism. Religious wars between two beliefs had also happened all around the globe Anno Domini: the Crusades between Christianity and Islam, the French Wars of Religion and the Thirty Years War in old Germany between Roman Catholicism and Protestantism.

In February this year, a group of twenty Ahmadiyya Muslims practicing their faith was attacked by a mob of 1,500 hardliner Muslims in west Java, Indonesia. I watched a compilation of videos from the attack and heard the mob leader shouting, “This is heathen!” and exclaiming “Allahu akbar” meaning God is the Greatest before they started throwing rocks at the house the Ahmadiyya Muslims were gathering.

What is it about religion that is so powerful? Religion is a man-made attempt to reach the higher power and it has been used too many times to justify human actions. Do people actually think their religion’s triumph over others as a way to secure their place in heaven?

Peter H. Gilmore, a High Priest of the Church of Satan, said "the biggest threat to [religion] are these fundamentalists who want to force people into their belief systems. They want to destroy people who have sexual activity the don't think is appropriate according to their texts". But people do fall into this trap.

One’s potent faith in their religion can bring destruction to others. But, let’s face it, we’re not even sure whether God truly exists. No man can say for certain that there is a heaven or hell, or that their religion is the righteous one. But then, it is also possible to think that men are being the greedy self that they are and use God’s name to get away with everything.
aku lelah

Kawan

Kawanku bukan orang penting.
Dia bukan pemimpin negara yang berasal dari kaum minoritas,
Dia bukan selebriti yang mempunyai pusat hiburan pribadi seluas 10.83 km2 di rumahnya,
Dia juga tak mengenakan mitra di atas kepalanya.

Kau mungkin berpapasan dengannya saat kau membeli rokok favoritmu,
Mungkin kau pernah duduk bersebelahan dengannya sembari menunggu datangnya bus kota,
Kau mungkin sudah beberapa kali menatap wajahnya di dalam bemo yang kau naiki,
Bahkan mungkin kau sudah pernah bercakap dengannya tanpa mengetahui namanya.

Kawanku bukan orang yang spesial.
Sehelai kaos yang warnanya mulai memudar menempel di punggungnya.
Jeans butut yang sudah sobek dan berlubang di sana sini dieratkannya dengan sabuk tua.
Sungguh tidak ada yang menonjol dari dirinya.

Ingin aku mengenalkanmu padanya.
Tapi aku tak bisa berjanji kau akan menyukainya.
Dia mungkin memiliki ideologi yang berlawanan denganmu,
Mungkin prinsip hidupnya berbeda denganmu,
Mungkin kau takkan menyukai warna kulitnya,
Bisa juga kepercayaanmu tak sejalan dengan kepercayaannya.

Maukah kau berkenalan dengannya? Ya?
Jika begitu akan kukenalkan dia padamu.
Kala kau sendirian di tengah keramaian,
Di pusat pertokoan, di angkutan umum, atau di jalur pejalan kaki di bahu jalan,
Tolehkanlah kepalamu ke arah orang asing di sebelahmu.

Perkenalkan, ia kawanku.

Biru

Langit di atas kepalaku biru
Aku menapakkan kakiku seiring dengan rambatan awan putih
Dia berada di atas kepalaku, berteman dengan birunya langitku, menciptakan harmoni
Sepelik apapun hari yang akan kuhadapi, aku akan berdendang bersama mereka

Orang baru di rumah kompleks belakang bukan sahabatku
Ia asing bagiku
Kami tak pernah bercakap,
Hanya senyum kecil yang kusunggingkan di bibirku kala aku berpapasan dengannya

Tak pernah aku bertandang ke rumahnya
Tak pernah pula aku mencuri buah mangga di kebunnya
Bahkan tak pernah aku tahu bagaimana rupa rumahnya
Aku tak begitu peduli

Entah apa yang telah kulakukan terhadapnya
Meskipun tak pernah aku membuat masalah dengannya, ia membenciku
Setiap pagi diluncurkannya pilar-pilar kelabu dari kebun belakang rumahnya
Asap dan abu memenuhi taman kecil di belakang rumahku

Aku tak bisa melihat biru langitku dan awan putih, kawannya
Langitku kini abu-abu
Aku rindu bentangan warna biru di atas kepalaku
Ia mengoyak biru langitku


Tetangga jahanam!

I Woke

I woke in the dark,
I didn't know where I was.
I woke and feared
I might be lost.

I woke in the dark,
Feeling empty
I woke and feared
I was left behind.

I woke and cried,
Not knowing what to do.
I woke and cried,
Feeling helpless.

I woke and cried,
I didn't want to feel this way.
I woke and cried,
Alone.

I don't want to wake
When it's dark,
Feeling afraid,
And crying.

I woke,
But it was dark,
And I was afraid,
So I cried,
Helplessly.

I woke and cried,
Cause I was afraid.
If I were to wake this way,
I might not want to wake at all.